Weddings have always been the most special of occasions to me. I'm such a hopeless romantic. Haha. Even when I happen to see the wedding procession of total strangers, that image brings a smile to my face and joy to my heart like not many other solitary sights could; it fills me with hope and faith entwined, with a reassurance in the universe and mankind, with wonder and excitement and anticipation for my own future. But when it's the wedding of a special friend, the event is even more significant. To be with your friend to celebrate the happiest day of her life and to witness that very first day of her greatest adventure is a unique and joyous experience. Sunday 3rd June was Ah ram's day- the Wedding Day of a very special friend.
Ah ram's wedding was the third Korean wedding I have attended although this one felt quite different from the previous two because both Ah ram and her husband were born in Korea and have spent their whole lives here and at this one, I was the only foreign person in attendance. When I arrived, I really didn't know what to do (the bride is in a different room having photos at this point) because there was no other foreign person that I could cling to like there had been at the previous weddings. However, Ah ram's family were lovely and welcomed me so kindly, just like the time they had welcomed me into their home. They are such a wonderful family. Afterwards I met up with mine and Ah ram's friend, Jong-young, and we were seated at at a table with the other hospital staff that Ah ram and Jong-young had worked with previously and I kind of knew from my many visits to the hospital with my injured ankle. I got to know them much better during the wedding and I also made some new Korean friends, too.
My friend was a beautiful bride and her husband looked so proud throughout the wedding service. It was so touching to watch. Poor Ah ram looked petrified though! I think she was focussing on not crying, although she did a little. So sweet. After the service she relaxed a lot and she was beaming from ear to ear. She looked like the happiest girl in the world. It was so lovely to see and so nice to think back to the time at the hospital when she told me that her boyfriend had proposed to her and that she'd said yes- Korean engagements are very short in Korea; there's no messing about just like in every other aspect of their lives.
After the service it was time for us to eat while the bridal party had photos. The food was amazing! I've never seen a buffet on such a grand scale before. During the reception we were called to the group photo and after this came Ah ram's "Surprise Event!" Oh my goodness. I was just standing, part of the group photo, minding my own business when I hear, "Chelseaaa! Chelsea, come here!" I almost died. Everyone's eyes zoomed to me, the only foreigner out of hundreds in the whole room, remember, and I had to go to the front with all these people staring at me, not entirely sure what was happening. She'd chosen me (I found out the specific details after) to catch her bouquet. The throwing and catching of the bride's bouquet works a little differently in Korea; it's a pre-organised thing. The bride chooses one person, usually her best friend, to catch the bouquet so it's not a random 'anyone could catch it' kind of thing like it is at home but has a similar notion (the girl who catches it will be married in the next six months. A specific time frame in Korea. Of course!) but is much more special and meaningful as you have been specifically chosen as the special friend. So Ah ram did things a little differently. She prepared two bouquets: one for her best friend and one for me. I could not believe it. It really was one of the nicest, most thoughtful things anyone has ever done for me. So that day will always be an especially memorable one for me.
Another thing that was really great about Ah ram's wedding is that I got to see the traditional Korean part which I hadn't seen before. It's called 'pyebaek' and it's the official acceptance of the bride into the groom's family. They wear traditional Korean clothes called 'hanbok' and the bride has bright red dots on her cheeks to symbolise youth and virginity. It looked so cute. It's much more simple and low key than the first westernised part, well except the entrance which included the groom riding in on a white horse and and Ah ram being carried in a little wooden carriage thing! It was remarkable! I've never seen anything quite like it! During the pyebaek service the couple meet the groom's parents first followed by his other relatives. Then they meet the bride's parents followed by the rest of her family. The couple perform the customary full bow for their elders and talk and drink (tea?- I'm not entirely sure!) and receive well wishes and gifts of money. But the most interesting part, in my opinion, was the throwing and catching of the dates and chestnuts. Both sets of parents throw a handful of both which the couple have to catch on the bride's apron that they hold between them. It's said to bring luck in fertility and signifies the amount of children they will bear and specifically how many boys and girls they will have depending on what is caught: chestnuts=sons and dates=daughters. It was very interesting and it was a really good opportunity to see something so traditional in a real context. I've never felt like I was in Korea more than when I was watching that service :)
Ah ram's Wedding Day was special for me in many ways and it is a day that will stay with me forever.
축하 해 아람 and 네 남편!
사랑해!
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